I turn the radio up,sing along to the loud music and wear a permanentsmile. It probably goes without saying that I chainsmoke as I drive. Whenever I reach a junction or getcaught in some traffic snarl-up or other I sneak a lookat the drivers alongside me, just to see if they arewatching. Sure enough I arrived long before Alan. I called him onhis mobile phone to make sure I had plenty of time todo what was required and he was still a couple of hoursaway. For once I didn’t mind the wait.I ran a deep, warm bath; not too hot, I didn’t want myhair to collapse! I lay there, thinking and smoking fora while, with a cup of coffee and my ashtray beside meon the shelf. It was an incredibly sensual experienceto gently bathe myself in the bubbly water, feeling myhands slide smoothly over my wet skin, as I awaited mylover. I could have lain there for hours but I stillhad things to do so I forced myself to get out andwrapped one of the huge soft towels around me.With the towel still. Im telling you shes thinking about you in a boyfriend kind of way. Im sure your wrong honey. I dont think so. But I knew my daughter was right. If Claire was an average 11 year old I would have said it was just a crush on a father like figure. But with the sexual environment I was suspecting that Claire had at home, her exposing her breast to me several times now and that lets fuck stare she kept giving me, I suspected there was a good chance that Claire was wanting to have sex with me. I had fantasized several times in the past weeks thinking about how it would look and feel to have sex with Claire and the thought that it could actually happen excited me, but the thought of it also scared me terribly. I remembered how close I came to having sex with Franke several years ago and later how relieved I was when it didnt happen. But I had a strong feeling that inevitably something was going to happen between Claire and me, I just didnt know when or where it would happen. It happened.
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